A Note From Seth
This past Sunday, we saw that there were people coming from Jerusalem and all Judea to be baptized by John in the Jordan River. Baptism wasn’t common, except for when outsiders (Gentiles) came to publicly demonstrate they were leaving behind their old life. But the incredible part of that story was that it wasn’t Gentiles who were coming down. It was the Jews. It was the religious insiders who had been waiting for God to act and move. So, when they heard God’s story was unfolding, they longed to be a part of it. In essence, they left the “cultural Christianity” behind (yes…I know it was Judaism). They felt God calling them out of sin towards righteousness, out of lesser things, and for greater purposes. Their response wasn’t half-hearted. In fact, it says that they were confessing their sins. But what does that look like?
When I was in seminary, I remember sitting in a counseling class when a professor said, “When you go to ask for forgiveness…remember that it’s not about you.” She went on to explain that so often we ask for forgiveness so that we can feel better about ourselves. We have guilt in our heart, but we treat it like a chip on our shoulder. We ask for forgiveness and then brush the chip off, without really caring if we cared for the person in front of us. Is that selfless? Or selfish? In Luke 15, Jesus tells a parable about a young man who gathers his inheritance early, only to squander it in another country. Upon realizing his error, he repents. He turns from that life and goes home. But in coming home, he says, “I have sinned against God, and against you (his earthly father).” When we sin, it hurts someone. First and foremost, it hurts God, who, as a holy God, is grieved by our sin. But it also hurts others. Yet how easy it is to make a half-hearted confession, asking for forgiveness so that we can move on.
When our confession is shallow, it’s likely that our conviction is shallow. We need a view of sin that doesn’t sugarcoat or candywrap it. When we do that, it not only minimizes its hurt and destruction, it also denies that sin is an outright cosmic rebellion against the One to whom we actually owe everything. It doesn’t matter how big or how small, acceptable or unacceptable sin is (in our culture)…sin shows us our total depravity. Apart from Christ, we would be totally corrupt. Yet Jesus, knowing our inability to fulfill any sense of the righteousness God demands, offers to step in “to fulfill all righteousness.” His baptism was a glimpse into what he would accomplish through his life, death, and resurrection. And he invites us, rather commands us, to follow his example by leaving behind our old way of life and following him into a new identity and new purpose.
If we want to take part in the great things that God is up to in bringing heaven to earth, then we need to pray for deep conviction and learn to practice deeper confession. Try these 7 A’s of Confession from Ken Sande’s book The Peacemaker.
Not every situation will demand all seven steps. So don’t panic! And remember, while God will always forgive, others may not. But if we follow the steps above, we can be sure we’re not only doing our part, but we’re also doing it well. Plus, the more we understand conviction of sin and confession of sin, the more our hearts become aligned with God. Tell me, where else can you express such a deep confession and walk away so joyful? Only in Christ. Praise be to God who grants us such a beautiful expression of love with himself and with others!
When I was in seminary, I remember sitting in a counseling class when a professor said, “When you go to ask for forgiveness…remember that it’s not about you.” She went on to explain that so often we ask for forgiveness so that we can feel better about ourselves. We have guilt in our heart, but we treat it like a chip on our shoulder. We ask for forgiveness and then brush the chip off, without really caring if we cared for the person in front of us. Is that selfless? Or selfish? In Luke 15, Jesus tells a parable about a young man who gathers his inheritance early, only to squander it in another country. Upon realizing his error, he repents. He turns from that life and goes home. But in coming home, he says, “I have sinned against God, and against you (his earthly father).” When we sin, it hurts someone. First and foremost, it hurts God, who, as a holy God, is grieved by our sin. But it also hurts others. Yet how easy it is to make a half-hearted confession, asking for forgiveness so that we can move on.
When our confession is shallow, it’s likely that our conviction is shallow. We need a view of sin that doesn’t sugarcoat or candywrap it. When we do that, it not only minimizes its hurt and destruction, it also denies that sin is an outright cosmic rebellion against the One to whom we actually owe everything. It doesn’t matter how big or how small, acceptable or unacceptable sin is (in our culture)…sin shows us our total depravity. Apart from Christ, we would be totally corrupt. Yet Jesus, knowing our inability to fulfill any sense of the righteousness God demands, offers to step in “to fulfill all righteousness.” His baptism was a glimpse into what he would accomplish through his life, death, and resurrection. And he invites us, rather commands us, to follow his example by leaving behind our old way of life and following him into a new identity and new purpose.
If we want to take part in the great things that God is up to in bringing heaven to earth, then we need to pray for deep conviction and learn to practice deeper confession. Try these 7 A’s of Confession from Ken Sande’s book The Peacemaker.
- Address everyone involved. Think about how easy it is not to go to the person whom you hurt. Or to address only one instead of two. Or to talk to God and not to the one you hurt. True confession addresses each party.
- Avoid if, but, and maybe. Who hasn’t started confessing, only to find themselves a few minutes in, realizing that they’re actually justifying their behavior by shifting some of the blame. Often, that starts with one of these words.
- Admit specifically. Whether it’s to not deal with guilt or shame, or out of pure laziness, we generally say, “God forgive me.” That’s not wrong, nor does it mean that God doesn’t accept it. But admitting specifically helps us own our sin.
- Acknowledge the hurt. This step makes sure we don’t gloss over the hurt. It seeks to understand it so that we know exactly how broken the relationship is. This is a great time to practice your empathy skills, showing you care about them more than yourself.
- Accept the consequences. Depending on the nature of the hurt, this may mean several things. What I do know is that we often want zero consequences. We say our peace and move on. We can’t just own the sin and hurt. We also own the process.
- Alter your behavior. Of course, this is with the Spirit’s help. But confession isn’t simply a plea so that we can continue living in the same behavior. It’s about repentance. We seek change because we care about those whom we hurt more than ourselves.
- Ask for forgiveness. Think about how much deeper our asking for forgiveness is if we’ve followed the steps above? It makes us appreciate how the depth of our sin allows us to experience a greater depth of God’s grace.
Not every situation will demand all seven steps. So don’t panic! And remember, while God will always forgive, others may not. But if we follow the steps above, we can be sure we’re not only doing our part, but we’re also doing it well. Plus, the more we understand conviction of sin and confession of sin, the more our hearts become aligned with God. Tell me, where else can you express such a deep confession and walk away so joyful? Only in Christ. Praise be to God who grants us such a beautiful expression of love with himself and with others!
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I loved reading this because I have lived through it all. What helps me is writing my prayer in a journal and by doing so, I can reflect on it and sometimes need to do more than asking for forgiveness from only God. Many people depend on much from me and that is what I want to do…help others. But sometimes I have to dismiss everything for some private time. Through this past year, I have found that I have much time on my own and I can keep helping others! Some people say I shouldn’t say yes to everything, but I want to! Loved your message…so true, every bit!